We don't feel fulfilled. We don't feel fully expressed on a deep level. We aren't who society says we "should" be. But we aren't quite sure what is missing.

The world needs us women to be rooted and living in our essence. More than anything. For the healing of our people and our planet. For reconstructing our culture that is deep in transformation. For leading the way. For reclaiming how 𝙛𝙚𝙢𝙞𝙣𝙞𝙣𝙚 𝙬𝙞𝙨𝙙𝙤𝙢 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙥𝙤𝙬𝙚𝙧 can change our world.

If we look to the ways that women have shown up throughout history-  ancient ways of being and unique gifts that women embodied - we can see and feel the arc of feminine wisdom pulsing through.

𝙒𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙞𝙛  learning about how you relate to these ancient ways helped give you permission 𝙩𝙤 𝙨𝙩𝙚𝙥 𝙞𝙣𝙩𝙤 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙩𝙧𝙪𝙩𝙝, 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙥𝙤𝙬𝙚𝙧, 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙪𝙣𝙞𝙦𝙪𝙚 𝙬𝙞𝙨𝙙𝙤𝙢?

𝙒𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙞𝙛  you were doing this with a group of other women courageously reclaiming their own feminine wisdom? Learning together where we have hidden ourselves, and 𝙝𝙤𝙬 𝙩𝙤 𝙗𝙚𝙘𝙤𝙢𝙚 𝙬𝙝𝙤 𝙬𝙚 𝙩𝙧𝙪𝙡𝙮 𝙖𝙧𝙚.

𝙒𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙞𝙛  working with 𝙥𝙡𝙖𝙣𝙩 𝙢𝙚𝙙𝙞𝙘𝙞𝙣𝙚𝙨 helped guide you on the journey back to your truth?

This summer, learn to trust your self more deeply.

𝗔𝗹𝘁𝗮𝗿𝘀 𝗼𝗳 𝗪𝗶𝘀𝗱𝗼𝗺 - 𝗣𝗹𝗮𝗻𝘁𝘀 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗔𝗿𝗰𝗵𝗲𝘁𝘆𝗽𝗲𝘀 𝗼𝗳 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗦𝗮𝗰𝗿𝗲𝗱 𝗙𝗲𝗺𝗶𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗲

We begin July 28.

Reach out for more info!

But it's not about the "things" - it's that moment when you rediscover who you are, 𝗧𝗛𝗔𝗧 is the gift. Your truth, your essence, your power, your beauty, your love, your beingness. Your landing into yourself. This is the moment that gets me up each day. It's a contagious moment, and it emanates throughout our world. It's medicine for everything. It is everything.

Don't get me wrong, I love my own personal journey with all the practices, rituals and adventures, and I love supporting other people's journeys too. You may know by now, that I love plants as medicines, as teachers. I absolutely love to connect and guide people to find themselves through meeting a plant teacher. These plant beings are so pure, powerful, loving and infinitely wise. When you truly meet a plant, you meet yourself. And the experience of joy, beauty and freedom when it all clicks together, when the energies align, when you are deeply in touch with your essence - 𝗧𝗛𝗔𝗧 is the potent medicine. From there, living life is a whole new experience.

These moments of rediscovery can happen in nature, a conversation, a meditation, a practice or ritual, an energetic clearing, or even a tarot reading. The old energy and old patterns release, and a reconnection is made. A reconnection that is medicine not only for you who experiences it, but for the entire world. 𝗧𝗛𝗔𝗧 moment, where the energetic alignment is divine.

Perhaps she was foretelling of our relationship, perhaps interweaving other times of past and future, calling me to remember  and embody her medicine.

Sometimes called Mama Coca, she feels to me also like a grandmother, an abuela. Abuelita Coca as she had me sing. She has a long history of being used in the Andean traditions of South America. Some say over 8,000 years. She has been used as both a sacred and as an everyday medicine. She was and still is a way of life in many places of the Andes. Even becoming used as a sort of currency, marking social gatherings, rituals, and ceremonies.

People share coca and pray together. Often for calling forth the 𝗧𝗥𝗨𝗧𝗛 of the matter, or the heart of the matter. 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗧𝗿𝘂𝘁𝗵 𝗧𝗲𝗹𝗹𝗲𝗿. Guiding us to align our voices with our 𝗛𝗘𝗔𝗥𝗧𝗦. An incredible plant teacher for connecting us to our own truths, to communicate with others, and to build strong relationships. 

Physically, she supports the Andean people living and working in high altitudes - bringing warmth and strength and alleviating hunger. She helps with digestion, menstrual cramps, and as an antibacterial and anesthetic. If you've had her tea or chewed her leaves, you know that her presence enlivens and brightens anyone's experience.

YES, I've adventured down my own unique path, guided by my intuition.

...AND I desire for these to also be truly accepted as part of humanity.

I've had to learn how to be these things in our world as it is. It's not been easy. But I'm not going to fit in, ever, in the way society wants me to. It's not who I am.

The dominant story that culture lays out for us is still not inclusive of these things - what can sometimes be considered part of our innate feminine wisdom. We are in deeply transformative times, and I honor the shifts. But to discover and embody who we are uniquely, who we are beyond the stories, is a life-long journey.

The reclamation of the feminine has been something I never anticipated having to re-learn. I grew up in an education and social system that has a dominant storyline - one that does not understand, honor or integrate the depths of feminine wisdom. I went on to enter a career as an engineer. One where my femininity didn't get to flourish.

Why is this important for me?

I have always deeply cared for our Mother Earth. She, the manifested creation of consciousness, is the ultimate divine feminine expression. What we have been doing to our Earth for centuries - destroying, ignoring, and treating her as something to be dominated - 𝗧𝗛𝗜𝗦 is also what we have been doing to our own feminine.

Without reclaiming our own feminine wisdom, we will not be able to resonate with the Earth. We will not be able to deeply feel and attune to her rhythms, her messages, her wisdom, or her care. We will most likely continue down this path of destruction, internally and externally, until it's too late.

Everything is interconnected. If we slow down to pay attention, we can reclaim lost parts of ourselves. The parts that society doesn't tend to value. But these are parts that we need online, and embodied, for humanity and our planet to truly thrive in the way that many of us envision.

I'm excited to announce that starting July 28, I'll be co-facilitating a 10-week ceremonial journey for women:

༄ 𝗧𝗲𝗺𝗽𝗹𝗲 𝗼𝗳 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗠𝗼𝗼𝗻 - 𝗔𝗻 𝗜𝗻𝗶𝘁𝗶𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻: 𝗣𝗹𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝗪𝗶𝘀𝗱𝗼𝗺, 𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗕𝗼𝗱𝘆 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗦𝗮𝗰𝗿𝗲𝗱 𝗙𝗲𝗺𝗶𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗲 ༄

Temple of the Moon is a map, or a medicine wheel, specifically for women. In this group, you attune to your feminine wisdom through ritual and practice. You align with the phases of the moon and how it impacts your physical earthly body. You connect with plant wisdom to strengthen, support and guide you, as has been done for thousands of years. You explore sacred feminine archetypes and how you can live in more alignment with your unique feminine truth.

As we all reclaim our feminine wisdom, and our bodies, we are reclaiming our Earth. This is what is needed now more than ever.

Much love,
Jaime

We don't have many ancient ruins here in the US.

Walking through these ruins, nearly a 1000 years old, feeling what life must have been like then, resets some of my modern ambitions. I marveled at the idea that a someone cut these stones into perfect lines. And someone made the mortar in between the stones. Hundreds if not thousands of people lived here in this canyon at one time, a hub of travelers moving from one place to another. And then they disappeared...

Feeling humbled in the grand scheme of LIFE, but trying to stay in the present, at the same time embodying all the people, the events, the lives that led up to now. One thing was clear, was they were deeply connected to spirit, to working with the mysterious ways of the Earth and the stars. Ceremony and ritual were interwoven in the fabric of their being. This is what my soul longs for.

I couldn't help but wonder what would have happened if the energies of this place were still kept sacred, maintained to serve our lives.

It's strange to me, that it's now operated by the government. These sacred places with so much to offer, not being cared for in ways that are possible. With the latest school shooting here in the US, my look at mortality and our  priorities as a society feels ripped open deeper into existential sadness.

I'm grateful for the chance to visit, to learn and see and feel what I needed to feel on this little pilgrimage.

May we find the strength to continue on, knowing that we are part of something much much greater.

Much love,
Jaime

𝗧𝗮𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗿𝗲𝘀𝗽𝗼𝗻𝘀𝗶𝗯𝗶𝗹𝗶𝘁𝘆 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗺𝘆 / 𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗱𝗲𝗰𝗶𝘀𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀 + 𝗰𝗵𝗼𝗶𝗰𝗲𝘀

I just spent a few weeks in the Amazon, in dieta, deep in connection with several trees. These trees, with their potent medicine, were teaching me about the power of my decisions and choices, and how to direct my energy and resources towards a larger vision.

It starts with my internal life - my thoughts, emotions, behaviors and choices. Giving up the old, outdated, well-worn patterns to create something more life giving and life fulfilling. 𝗧𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗶𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗸; 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗶𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗽𝗿𝗮𝗰𝘁𝗶𝗰𝗲. In each and every moment, I have the possibility of making the shift. It emanates out into my relationships with people. Not only in how I show up in relationship, but also choosing who do I want to spend time and energy with; what types of relationships are nourishing; what communication and interaction styles are acceptable.

What do I have to give up in order to lead the life I choose? Am I willing to give up the old emotional patterns, the comfortable distractions, the not believing in myself, and the tired relationship patterns? If so, it requires a discipline and commitment to make the changes.

These Amazonian trees, in their formidable strength reminded me of the importance of my decisions and my actions. Teaching me to reclaim my personal power in all the seemingly smallest ways.

"𝗜 𝗴𝗲𝘁 𝘁𝗼 𝗰𝗵𝗼𝗼𝘀𝗲 𝘄𝗵𝗶𝗰𝗵 𝘄𝗮𝘆 𝘁𝗼 𝗴𝗼."

I have to take responsibility for all of my choices. Going after what I believe in, requires taking a stand, with conviction for what I know in my 𝗛𝗘𝗔𝗥𝗧 is truth -  and that is 𝗧𝗥𝗨𝗘 𝗣𝗢𝗪𝗘𝗥.

And yes, there is a delicate and beautiful balance of surrendering into the mystery, and having conviction. Direction in life is co-created. And there are sacrifices that will need to be made. Once the vision is clear, the job is to tend to and protect it, and to learn how to channel energy and resources to serve it.

I get to decide (to the extent of co-creativity) where to go on the river of life. No one else says how my life goes. I will not give my power away to the corporations, the government, the culture, the community, family or friends... Each decision, I consider the consequences to make a choice. This goes for consideration of how it impacts our Earth, future generations, and our communities.

The impacts on the larger view are not so easy to see. How our decisions impact the Earth - my home, 𝗢𝗨𝗥 𝗛𝗢𝗠𝗘 - is something our world is struggling to understand. I worked for 10+ years in the environmental field, attempting to make a difference in the protection and care for all of it's natural beauty, diversity and life-giving resources. Working for non-profits, corporations, and regulatory agencies, I found what was most often missing was the 𝗛𝗘𝗔𝗥𝗧 connection to the Earth. It wasn't completely non-existent, but almost all the work was entirely removed from being in intimate relationship with the Earth, her rhythms, her power and her as Mother. It was reduced to numbers, money, regulations, and how much we humans can get away with.

Many people do not know how our little everyday decisions impact everything else on the planet. Having studied these things for years, I often know too much. So much , that in my 20s, I went into overwhelm, feeling a lot of grief and despair. Every choice had dire consequences - harming and polluting the ecosystem, contributing to the mistreatment of animals, or the inequality of humans. In many ways, a part of me gave up, feeling so small and insignificant. So I shifted to focus on the heart connection. From the 𝗛𝗘𝗔𝗥𝗧, I feel that we can more easily make decisions that honor and respect the entire planet.

But we have to get sober, learn the facts, and live up to the truth. It's not comfortable, or easy. Taking a stand for what we believe in, even if it goes against the grain, is not a popular place to be. Having awareness is a responsibility. A responsibility to embody it, and live it. 

No one is making decisions and choices perfectly. We aim to do the best we can. Let's start with simple shifts in our decisions and choices. And the let the shifts emanate out into the world, in our communities, our businesses, and our systems. We are not separate from this Earth we live on, and everything we do has an impact interwoven with all things.

I choose my vision, I choose my heart, and I accept the path before me.

Returning home, the work with the plants continues. The 1-2+ months after dieta, is the most important time for integration. Everything that transformed is tested and put into practice. Every experience, interaction and decision, back in everyday life is a 𝗧𝗘𝗔𝗖𝗛𝗜𝗡𝗚. You have the choice - to return to the old ways, or to choose a new way - one supported by the plants and their wisdom. And there is no wrong way - you will always get a new chance if you fall into old patterns again. But it takes 𝗔𝗪𝗔𝗥𝗘𝗡𝗘𝗦𝗦. The pathways have been carved out in dieta, and now you get the chance to live into them fully. This is truly embodying the work and teachings of the plants.

Returning back, I again recognize how valuable integration support is. Support that provides healing, clarity, safety, vulnerability, empowerment, encouragement, reflection, all interwoven with the depth and complexities of plant medicine wisdom and experience. This is one reason I offer integration to others - to weave together the plant teachings into life, transforming at the deepest levels. To steward the work of the plants, so people can live life to their fullest, emanating the wisdom of the earth in all they do.

I have a few openings for new clients in April. Would be happy to share more. Just reach out, anytime.

The plants send their love to all.


With gratitude,
Jaime

I leave, clear, grounded, connected and at peace. I know I will return again and in the meantime, I carry the wisdom and the incredible beauty of my experience, of the master plants, of Madre Tierra herself with me always. That is the great gift of this work. May it continue to unfold in blessings internally and externally out into this world.

Thank you to the dear friends, new and old, who were a part of this in any big or small way.

Muchas gracias to my friends, for holding the container with so much love and support to be able to enter into, move through and come out the other side of dieta. It’s a delight and an honor to have you in my life. Truly.

Thank you to the beautiful souls who trusted me, the plants, the calling into the jungle enough to take a leap into the unknown. What courage and commitment- to yourself, to your unfolding, and to the Earth. My heart is full knowing that you too have been deeply moved into a new reality. May it serve you in the most incredible ways.

🌿🌿🌿

Have you ever had trust of a "shaman"/facilitator/healer broken? How did you respond? (Internally or externally)

This was a question I asked a few weeks ago in the Integration Facebook Community. (Link HERE).

Trust is one of the most important aspects of a healing container. Without it, we don't feel safe to open to our deepest wounds where we can be vulnerable enough to heal.

The range of experience of broken trust varies widely. I will share here about the healing container of plant medicines, some common things to watch out for, and how you can approach it when it happens. There is no one right way to navigate through.

The point is that YOU are in the driver's seat of your healing journey, not anyone else.

This topic stirs up a lot in the plant medicine (and spiritual/healing) world. Many of us have had our trust broken, which is heart-breaking and can be devastating or even traumatizing. These situations can take years to heal and recover from.

This is a tricky space to navigate through - but it is deep work that is rich with learning and healing.

I'd say in many cases, when working with a "shaman" or any other spiritual teacher or healer over a long period of time, it *may* be unavoidable. Each person and situation is different. Personally, it has happened several times, where eventually there has been a break in trust.

The reason for this is we are deep in a shamanic and healing space. Our realities, perceptions, personalities, protections, are wide open. We are at our most vulnerable state. We often look to the "shaman" as protector of that space, as we are healing parts of ourselves, and until we learn to hold our own and take responsibility for our own experience.

Placing Trust and Power Outside of Ourselves
Most of our emotional healing is working through traumas, wounds and other experiences we may have had in childhood (and also patterns from generations and lifetimes that we are still carrying in the present). So it's entirely natural to unconsciously project the role of caretaker (mom, dad, grandparents, aunts, uncles, foster parents, etc) onto a "shaman." As we do this unconsciously, we also project unconscious expectations onto them. Many of us give them power of "healing", and we trust them unequivocally. We expect them to behave in ways that either our caretakers did, or in the opposite ways to what our caretakers did. Our unconscious is intelligently bringing these expectations up to be resolved, so we can move on and repair the wounding. We can also make people in these roles into the "perpetrators" from past traumatic events. Again, our unconscious is trying to resolve and heal.

They may dismiss your experience or tell you how to interpret what you've experienced. Gaslighting is something that can happen when an incident of trust has been broken in plant medicine and spiritual circles. Often, focus is diverted to  the themes of "it's all love and light" or "it's just your projection." Some "shamans"/healers/facilitators are not able,  or willing to talk about and address deeper issues and traumas that arise in the space.

The unequal power dynamics can allow for "shamans" to get away with things that we wouldn't normally allow. Some have not done enough of their own shadow work. Some haven't been adequately trained or know what to do when trauma arises in the space. Some do not know how to work with energies and keep the space clean and clear. And many have not been studying or working with plant medicines for long enough to develop all the skills required to handle the infinite situations that can arise. It's not something you simply learn in 1 or 2 years. It's a long path to grow and learn through many initiations with teachers, plants and decades of experience.

And Listening to the Plants
Plant medicines can be incredible teachers and healers - as they can be there for us on very deep intimate levels. (Again, not to give all our power to the plants themselves, and put them on pedestals - but explore what are they pointing to in ourselves?) They can reach and attune to us in ways that most people cannot - they can teach and show us all the ways we aren't being with ourselves - maybe we are fighting ourselves internally, resisting, not accepting ourselves or something that happened, or not taking responsibility for our lives. Maybe we are placing too much of our power and expectations outside, not empowering ourselves from the inside out. It's not comfortable work, but the plants can guide us to see exactly what is arising in our consciousness that is ready to be learned and resolved.

Cultural Differences
In many instances, there are cultural differences that lead to a break in trust. It's easy and common for Westerners to place indigenous or other cultures on pedestals - projecting onto something that they don't understand. The Western psyche and worldview is very different than that of indigenous or Amazonian traditions. Behaviors in ceremony that are culturally accepted in other places in the world may not match your own ethical standards. You have to get clear on your expectations and needs for a healing ceremony and learn how other cultures may or may not match those.  I don't work in certain traditions/lineages for this reason. I have found some commonly accepted behaviors of some traditions do not align with my own standards of integrity in a healing space.

Always, like falling in love in the everyday world, we have to get to know the REAL person over time - how they communicate, behave, what they desire in relationship, etc. Because what can happen in shamanic space, has to be integrated into the 3D reality as well. This is a powerful time to look at the heart - YOUR HEART - and what love actually is, what it means to you and how it is healing. Projecting love outward serves it's purpose, but remember to return to yourself to learn the power of your own heart's healing.

Sexual Energy
Like falling in love, sexual energy arises in ceremonial space. The human tendency is to project the sexual energy out there onto someone else. The someone else could be in the room, or could be someone in life, or even an unseen being. Again, it's not that the plants are "telling" you to have a sexual relationship with this person/being. They are bringing your sexual energy to your awareness, including your own conditioning, patterns, and projection outwards. Many of our patterns with sexual energy are unconscious, so they arrive to the surface so that we can see them and learn. Instead of having someone else be the focus, return attention inwards into your learning about how to work with your own sexual energy. This is probably one of the most common places that trust can be broken, as shamans/facilitators and participants can cross boundaries energetically or physically. Choosing a facilitator/shaman who knows how to work with sexual energy, can manage their own, and not get involved is extremely important. Any facilitator that crosses boundaries energetically or physically is NOT in the role of a healer. They are most often acting in their own self interest, taking advantage of the situation and power dynamic. Both energetic and physical crossing of boundaries can be traumatizing or re-traumatizing. In my world, any sexual behavior is 100% inappropriate and severely damaging in medicine spaces. In some cultures, this is more common and accepted, though it seems to me that even in other cultures it's something that "shamans" get away with, rather than an integral practice in their culture (though there may be exceptions to this).

Role as Healer
The truth is people in these roles aren't our caretakers, our perpetrators, or our lovers. These are the boundaries that most of us expect when working with a "shaman" or healer.  When something happens, and the roles get mixed up, and/or they don't meet our expectations of the roles we've assigned to them, our trust is broken. It's extremely sensitive, vulnerable and can be re-traumatizing.

 While friends can be helpful, be careful, as friends are often not trained to guide you through the healing. I suggest a trusted and trained therapist, healer, integration support, trauma specialist, somatic experiencing, etc.

Not only can they help you process the emotions, and deeper wounding, they can help you look more objectively at the situation that happened. If you removed the projections, what actually happened? It's hard to see what happened sometimes when we are triggered and wrapped up in the experiences. From here, you may better see if what happened was out of alignment with your expectations, or maybe there were cultural differences that played a role.  Maybe the actions and behavior did not meet your standards or expectations of behavior for being in the role of "shaman."  Maybe boundaries were crossed. Looking at how the interplay happened from many angles gives you a more grounded view, so that you can see what your next steps are.

2 - Do Your Shadow Work
Sometimes we humans have a tendency to blame or want to punish others that seem to have done us wrong. While something may have happened that is inappropriate, or goes against our standards, it is also very important to do your own shadow work here. This requires us to look at our expectations and projections that that we may have been placing on these people in these roles. Were you expecting them to meet you, love you, and care for you exactly in the ways that you didn't  receive in childhood? Or perhaps you were unconsciously expecting them to dismiss, demean, or mistreat you, like your childhood experience, so that you could again turn the blame on them. Get beyond the initial reactions, and look deeper into how this situation has mirrored something from your past. This may also require further development of your own energetic awareness, as understanding the subtle energies at play can be extremely important in shamanic spaces. The actual trigger may not have been outwardly seen, but an inwardly felt and experienced.

3 - Advocate for Yourself
You get to determine how you want to handle the situation. I encourage exploration on your own time, and with support. When it comes to how you move forward, it's entirely in your hands. Every case is unique. There is no one right way to handle these situations. The severely damaging cases of sexual or physical assault require a different response, than an interplay of energies. Please get immediate professional help if you have experienced sexual or physical assault in these spaces.

The connection, inter-being, and dissolution in the jungle is one of Heart + Earth + Spirit. Here you rebirth and empower the deepest, truest parts of you once forgotten, but now called forth into full being.

Last call to join us March 3-11, 2022 for a 𝗠𝗔𝗦𝗧𝗘𝗥 𝗣𝗟𝗔𝗡𝗧 𝗗𝗜𝗘𝗧𝗔 in the high jungles outside Tarapoto, Peru. Incredible healing work, with Preparation + Integration. Please reach out for more info!